Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Bless Your Heart {Better than 'Here's Your Sign'}

Did you know you can say anything you want to a person if you follow up with Bless Your Heart? No, it's true! I've heard it explained before and thought it was hilarious. I've heard Ken say it time and again to people he met through funerals when they share TMI at Target or Fred Meyer, but my brother Ryan just figured it out and wrote a blog post about it. Since many of my ideas are actually liberated from other people, I too have decided to write a post about it. Here are some real life things that have happened, that I coulda/shoulda/woulda said bless your heart, if I'd thought of it.  NOTE TO SELF...
  • Look at that mullet your mama just gave you, bless your heart.
  • OR, You got a haircut, bless your heart.
  • Looks like you're wearing more food on your shirt than you were able to eat, bless your heart.
  • That's the 3rd time you've fallen down that step today, bless your heart.
  • Wow, you really can't sing at all, bless your heart.
  • I like your blog, bless your heart.
  • You ran that mile in just over 20 minutes, bless your heart.
  • Thank you for bearing your testimony, bless your heart.
  • You can't play with my kids because you're really naughty, bless your heart.
  • Comment: I spent 3 hours at the welfare office this afternoon and then they ended up cutting me welfare benefits. Response: Bless your heart for staying the whole 3 hours.
  • Comment: No matter what I do, that cat just keeps peeing on my rug. I'd get rid of him if I didn't love him so much. Response: Bless your heart for not drowning him in a trash can!
This one is made up, but my favorite.
  • You're Ryan's Sister? Bless your heart.
Okay, you get the point. I need to start saying bless your heart!

2 comments:

  1. It drives Vaughn crazy when I do that. Although I do it in the form of "I just adore them but..."

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  2. Bwahahahaha! Dedra, I wish so much that there were no creeps out there so the whole wide world could read your blog.

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